| Intimacy & Solitude |
[Jan. 7th, 2010|12:14 am] |
Hi all.
Borrowed a book from my boyfriend recently called "Intimacy & Solitude - balancing closeness and independence" by Stephanie Dowrick.
Anyone else read it perchance?
If not, I highly suggest you do, especially as infp's, as it seems quite a naturally-geared-toward-infp'ish-people sort of book and topic (as I'm sure you have already surmised from the title).
I won't go into all of the topics covered in it (as there are a lot, as well as a lot of very enlightening psychological information about what 'happens' when an infant, in regards to intimacy and being by oneself).
But a very main important and astounding idea I've gleaned from it is:
When one has positive experiences with others, one is able to have a positive experience being solitary. And when one has negative experiences or interactions with others then one is more likely to end up feeling 'alone' or lonely rather than very decently comfortable and expansive in oneself.
And also that one needs to develop oneself and have a secure sense of self in order to be able to have more satisfying experiences of intimacy (though I felt that that idea was pretty much a given?). Turning it the other way around was what surprised me much more... "You mean, it goes both ways?" ;-)
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| Educational system |
[Jan. 4th, 2010|04:14 pm] |
Greetings, fellow INFPs, man, and sentimental sentient beings.
Naturally, I have been watching this community and others similar in context and content and am inherently intrigued by the wide array and syllogism of the subterfuge that buttresses the axiom of ones integrity. Regardless, today I pose the innocuous inquisition do you feel the educational system harbors equivocal merit to the phrase “non scholae sed vitae discimus?” Also, how has the educational system affected you as an INFP for the better or worse? With school beginning once again for most I thought it pertinent to inquire how others felt about the educational system with it’s many flaws. Even though perfection is simply a mere refraction of relativities of reality super imposed on the wall of the cave.
All thoughts, comments, and rants on the subject would be appreciated.
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| And I'll go first. |
[Dec. 31st, 2009|05:56 pm] |
What religion are you, and why?
I was raised as a Southern Baptist but I fell away from that as a teenager and I was actively hostile towards that faith, and towards Christianity in general, until I was in my mid-twenties.
And then I met a Jewish man and we started talking about building a life together, and I wanted to learn more about the culture and religion that produced him, so I started reading about Judaism and attending services, and then I met with a rabbi and started the formal conversion process.
I chose to be a Reform Jew and went to the mikveh (ritual bath for the purpose of conversion)in December 1994 after about 1 ½ yrs of study. I chose Reform because it was geographically convenient, but the liberal movements of Judaism fit with my understanding of God. I know there are philosophical differences between Reform and Conservative, but I think they are gradually merging together. Reform is returning towards traditional practice, and the evolution of Conservative halacha (Jewish ritual laws) is growing closer to Reform practice. I like them both. I feel at home in both kinds of congregations. If I chose to affiliate with a Conservative congregation, I’d have to go to the mikveh again, but that wouldn’t be a big deal for me. (Meaning, I wouldn’t mind it.)
What do I like about Judaism?
1. Learning is valued. Exegesis is valued. Looking at different perspectives and arguing about meaning has been the crux of Judaism for 5000 years. You’re supposed to argue with God. You’re not supposed to turn off your brain when you walk into synagogue. You’re supposed to learn/study daily – not rote memorization, but critical study.
2. The idea that this life is important in and of itself, that it’s not merely a rehearsal or a prologue for the afterlife, that it’s not a mere blip in metaphysical existence. This becomes important when talking about social justice. When you look at other models of existence, if this mortal life is not important in comparison with all eternity, then what is the point of fighting for justice in this world? If there will be pie in the sky by and by, then accepting situations in this life as-is becomes an easier proposition. Especially if you’re being oppressed by somebody, when it becomes divinely ordained that you take it and don’t talk back. Judaism is aggressively in the face of this attitude (although more so in the last 50 years than before).
3. The wheel-of-fortune idea, that you may have blessings now but you might not have them later, or you might not have them now but you might later, reinforced by the story of Job and the concept of Jubilee and shmitta. That it is incumbent upon those who have blessings to assist those who do not, not because they love people so much but because it is the just, right, and moral thing to do.
4. The idea that we are partners in creation with God, that we should work with the materials given to us by the Almighty and together produce bread or houses or whatever – and that ties back into the social justice ideas. God doesn’t rain manna down from Heaven anymore, it’s up to us, as partners with God, to provide for those who are not currently being blessed. Tikkun Olam – healing the world – is also part of this – that it’s our job to make the world a better place.
5. It’s a way for me to experience the Almighty that provides both intellectual and spiritual/emotional fulfillment, a sense of community, a sense of purpose, and a moral framework.
6. The idea that Judaism is not exclusive – it’s not the only way to approach God and righteousness is not an exclusively Jewish trait.
7. It’s an Abrahamic framework, so a lot of it was familiar to me already from my childhood.
8. It’s not fatalistic. There is the idea that God has a plan, but we do have choices.
9. Women are valued. Really and truly valued. No, it's not perfect. Yes, there are still problems. However, it's a lot better than what I grew up with. The first service I attended was the sisterhood service at the Reform temple where I was living at the time. I cannot fully express how powerful it was to me for women to be on the pulpit (I didn’t know the word “bimah” at the time), leading the service, reading from the Torah. In the liberal (i.e., Reform and Conservative) movements, women can be rabbis and have equal footing for responsibilities and honors. In Orthodoxy, there are a lot more “can’ts” for women, but even in Orthodoxy, women have rights, obligations, and esteemed status. Eshet Chayil (A Woman of Valor, from a passage in Proverbs) is not a delicate flower of womanhood – she’s industrious and she handles her business, both in her home and in her community, and her husband is supposed to formally praise her at least weekly. This is in stark contrast to the fragile yet selfless nurturer “Angel in the House” image that I grew up with – that women should be meek, submissive, and lack autonomy in every arena.
10. There is no expectation of evangelism. This was difficult to wrap my head around as I was in the process of conversion, because traditionally converts are supposed to be denied 3 times before being accepted as students. I come from a tradition where converts are actually sought out, pulled in off of streetcorners and smothered with sugar, and are encouraged to pray and convert without a lot of preparation. To go from that to a tradition where conversion is actively discouraged because it has been actually illegal during various points of history was difficult. And then I had to study and learn about history, traditions, rituals, prayers, and learn a whole different language with a whole different alphabet. I felt like I had to scrap and claw my way in. However, it made me examine my motivations for searching on the spiritual journey. It ties into the non-exclusivity idea of Judaism. Why go to all this trouble if you can be just as cloe to God by following another religion? There's nothing wrong with being a Gentile. I guess where I'm going with this is that I appreciate it more because I had to work so hard for it.
So, what's your story? |
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| Let's get some conversations going. |
[Dec. 31st, 2009|05:30 pm] |
I cribbed these from The Faith Club, which came out several years ago now. I know folks here in this community had mixed reactions to the book, but the questions put forth in the reader guide were good ones.
So - in the interest of generating traffic, pick one of these and discuss.
What religion are you, and why?
How do you practice?
What are some of the personal and educational experiences that have defined your faith, your religion, and your relationship to God?
What are your stereotypes of religious vs. nonreligious people? |
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| hello |
[Dec. 29th, 2009|10:40 pm] |
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i'm just out making connections and trying to find other muslims, muslimahs, muslim friendly, or other likeminded folk. i look forward to following this community as it looks quite interesting. |
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| Good News this Holiday Season |
[Dec. 28th, 2009|10:57 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  complacent | ] |
We've all heard from various "news sources" that ACORN were dead, defunded, etcetera. All untrue. ACORN is alive and well and continuing to enroll disenfranchised people all over the country. Judge for yourself, this is one of their mailing I received today:
There have been more than a few hard days this year. But today isn't one of them. For one thing supporters like you have been responding strongly to our 2009 Year-End Fundraising Campaign to help us keep fighting for working families.
For another, today I get to tell you about the results of the investigation into ACORN by former Massachusetts Attorney General Scott Harshbarger. While he had some tough words for us, he made clear, contrary to the hysterical reports on FOX News, "there is no evidence that action, illegal or otherwise, was taken by any ACORN employee on behalf of the videographers." [1]
Then there's the preliminary injunction US District Judge Nina Gershon issued against the Defund ACORN Act! She said it amounted to an unconstitutional "bill of attainder" -- or illegally singling out a specific organization for punishment without due process. [2]
As our lawyers at the Center for Constitutional Rights said,
"This historic decision by the Court affirms the fundamental constitutional principle that the Congress cannot be judge, jury, and executioner."
And went on to say that the attacks were a result of,
"ACORN's tireless commitment to registering voters, particularly average Americans who have been consistently disenfranchised and excluded from the American political system."
Amen to that!
All this good news shows that we're on the right side of history -- and so are you -- and we need your help to take the next steps as we close out 2009.
We know we aren't perfect but let me be crystal clear: It is our SUCCESS that makes the Glenn Beck/Sarah Palin crowd so determined to destroy us. According to a study by the New Organizing Institute (NOI), 746,000 people cast ballots in 2008 that had been successfully registered by ACORN since 2004.
Their attacks have only strengthened the commitment of ACORN members and supporters. In the words of MN ACORN Board Member Jane Thomson, "Make no mistake, if you manage to kill ACORN, the people who worked so hard there will be back in another campaign with another organization. You will have to kill us to kill our work."
Amen to that, too! Help us ensure that the work the radical right is so anxious to stop continues in 2010.
Today ACORN members across the country are fighting to improve the historic health care bill before its final passage in both houses of Congress. And in the coming year we are going to continue fighting so working families facing foreclosure can keep their homes and the Wall Street bankers who got us into this economic trainwreck are held accountable. Click here to contribute to ACORN and help us enter 2010 ready to fight for the critical issues facing working families.
This run of positive news has really energized me. But ACORN is still facing enormous opposition and challenges from people who fear the good work we do. Turnout among new voters will be extremely important in the 2010 elections, which is one of the biggest reasons why the radical right is so dedicated to an ACORN-free America. But the good news is that progressives just aren't buying it and people like you are contributing to help ACORN continue to fight back and stand up for working families. Please help support ACORN's work before the end of the year.
With your support we will make sure that working families have a strong voice in 2010.
In solidarity and strength,
Bertha Lewis
ACORN CEO and Chief Organizer
PS. Yet another report exonerating ACORN was released last week. The non-partisan Congressional Research Service released an 85-page report that found no wrong-doing by ACORN and suggests that the videographers broke state laws with their secret taping. You can read more about it here.
- Report of former Massachusetts Attorney General Scott Harshbarger
- Center for Constitutional Rights web page on Defund ACORN lawsuit.
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